Thinking of Home

         After studying away from home for the past 3 years, I have realised that I find it extremely difficult to focus on my duties and responsibilities when I head back to my accommodation at the end of a day.

          I never was really lost when I was in primary or secondary school. I would come home and know what had to be done. Sure there was structure and routine, but those existed in a familial context; and it has taken me 3 years living away from home to realise that there are missing elements when a young bird leaves its nest.

          Sure there is freedom, yet there is also a sense of restlessness. I believe it is easy to overcome the uneasiness of leaving home by indulging in activities that occupy our time, mind and energy, yet these lines from George Herbert’s poem ‘The Pulley’

                   When God at first made man,

Having a glass of blessings standing by;

Let us (said he) pour on him all we can:

Let the world’s riches, which dispersed lie,

                   Contract into a span.

So strength first made a way;

Then beauty flowed, then wisdom, honour, pleasure:

When almost all was out, God made a stay,

          Rest in the bottom lay.  

          For me, this sense of restlessness is perhaps due to a lost sense of real community. I know I am much more hardworking when I am out of my current rented house, but when I am inside my room, I often am distracted.

          I don’t believe there is a quick fix to this issue. Perhaps I could be more meticulous when I am planning my timetable, or perhaps I should be more disciplined in implementing my proposed plan for when I get back. Yet, I think there is a deeper issue that I have to resolve. Should I seek a permanent sense of rest and security on this earth? Should I seek to establish a comfortable hearth and home? I certainly think that the answer is ‘no’ even if I want it to be in the affirmative.

          The Apostle Peter calls Christians exiles (1 Peter 1:1; 1:17), and he wants us to have a future-focused framework. He says ‘therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ’ (1:13).

So I am living today waiting for the time when Jesus returns to me home. If today, or tomorrow, or the day after, I feel rootless, like a fleeing refugee, I have to remind myself that this shouldn’t be unusual. Instead, I should relish in the hope that one day, those memories I have of my childhood spent with family will be perfected when my Saviour and my King returns to take me and my Christian brothers and sisters home. There, we will find perfect rest.